The Sound of…

ipod

Q&A a Day: What are you obsessively listening to? The Sound of Silence and The Sound of Music; both answers and titles. I listen to the gym radio in the morning (unless I bring my headphones, which is rare), Duolingo (a language-learning app) while I’m walking dogs and their feet click on the sidewalk, country or classical music in the car, loud high schoolers while waiting for class (because they borrow our campus gym), a professor’s spiel for at least an hour, and elementary kids for at least two hours.

The evening routine changes on whether I go to the gym on the way home, if the neighbors are out to talk to, whether we’re making dinner or eating leftovers, how Caleb’s day went, if I get any video clips or phone calls, the typing of keys nightly to post, the turning of pages as I start a new book Artificial Minds, water from the shower and doing dishes, doggy guts digesting food as they dream loudly, and cars whizzing by outside as I finish crunching on dessert.

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What’s Outside?

Q&A a Day: Outside, the weather is… delightful. It was in the 50s F when I dropped Caleb off at the airport at 6:30am. The temperature hadn’t changed when I arrived to a closed gym at 7am, but it climbed into the 80s for the afternoon.

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Breakfast was a piñata apple with peanut butter; and lunch the farm collection from yesterday to consist of tomatoes, chard, a cubanelle pepper, broccoli, eggs, fava bean leaves, and Thai basil (with added pepper). I had a probiotic apple cider vinegar drink, turmeric-ginger flavored, throughout the afternoon. I was going to go paddle boarding and remembered that my car is in the shop as of yesterday.

I went outside after 2pm for some vitamin D and the neighbor’s kid wandered over and offered to trade me some yard work help for some time playing with his bubble guns. We didn’t shake on it, but he was enthusiastic and got his sisters to help us. So instead of just trimming around the walkway I was able to accomplish raking and weeding most of the front and side yard in an hour and a half; and ruined my pink gloves in the process.

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Dinner would be a homemade white bean-lentil burger with some leftover tempeh-kale pasta and a mushroom coffee with two figs for dessert. Caleb will enjoy a less-than-a-mile walk to Wal-Mart in Mobile, Alabama for a turkey sandwich and some almonds for dinner. He got left behind for the beer and football party bus while he was showering.

Caleb got his much-wanted aisle seat for both flights and first-class leg room while he watched The Glass Castle, a film he’s been waiting to watch since its release after he read the book. It’s about 60 degrees now, in both states, but Caleb has rain to look forward to this week while my location shows nothing but a big round and bright sun.

What’s outside for you?

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Sad Stories

Q&A a Day: On a scale of one to ten, how sad are you? Why? 10 being the saddest, I’m a 1. Why, because I’m a month away from my anniversary and already celebrating. I got told today that my dogs are well-behaved (they’re blind, there’s a difference). Caleb is leaving for work for a week, but I’ve already got plans to stay busy — gym, school, work, garden, paddle board, dogs, homework, study, eat all the leftovers he made me today so that I wouldn’t have to bother (with the cooking or the cleaning), and call him every day to make sure he’s still reading my posts and see how his day went.

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broccoli tots with sriracha

This year will mark the third year since my mom passed and it has gotten tons easier to at least think about her now without crying abruptly, but has also added distance between the siblings and I since I haven’t been back to Texas since. I wished my older brother a happy birthday three weeks ago via Messenger by sending him a cake emoji and haven’t heard back. I talked with my sister who is expecting her fourth child with her fiancé Mikey, and my niece Irie who is almost three, over video. I haven’t spoken with my little brother since I wished him a happy birthday last June.

I don’t talk with my dad as much as I used too and definitely miss seeing him as often, but he was off changing the world one glorious step at a time, and now I’m busy making changes to mine, planning for my future, setting goals, and being happy. He visits with my grandmother who is still recovering from her stroke in a care facility and I hope to come out and visit soon and see Caroline while I’m there. It would’ve been nice to see my aunts as well, but I was, and am still, recovering from my broken toe and not ready for so many stairs and no bathtub.

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hello salad

Caleb and I are closer to his one uncle than we are the rest of both of our extended families combined. It probably helps that he comes to visit, lives in a beautiful area, has a very nice wife, and messages us from time to time. Caleb got to meet some of his family for the first time in 20 years and we were only disappointed with one person. I’m used to seeing my family every five years when my mom would miss them most. I got invited to a cruise this summer and had no idea where we would be by then, but I think it too strange to do something I’m not ready for with people I barely know.

That sums up family, and as far as friends go… I spent a decade keeping in touch with childhood classmates, military memories, and crazy coworkers. I’ll never forget their faces but the rest begins to fade as the years stretch on without a word. Most people are temporary in your life and the lesson can be a difficult one, but others will always be there with a couch to crash, a joke to tell, and food. I try to hold onto these ones, though I’ve got my best friend with me and he holds on tight and always will. I’m not sad. I’m not allowed to be, because I’m too spoiled for that.

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more greens! more veggies!

As far as my day went, I got to sleep in and listen to a European Starling before the gym opened. They are an invasive species but I wouldn’t mind having one living in the backyard (if I had the tree for it that was sadly cut down). We got a bit sweaty, did a good shoulder workout, and then went to the store for veggie sausage to have with our eggs and broccoli tots for breakfast.

We took the dogs to the estuary and ran into one of the farmers tending his crop of tomatoes, chard, eggs, broccoli, fava bean leaves, and Thai basil — just to name some of the items he gifted us and invited us to come back. I hadn’t planned on being in the sun so long, but we reddened our skin and got a salad in the process. Our shiny new double-handed pots arrived today to replace the antique ones with flowers on the sides, handles falling off, and holes wearing in the bottom, that my mom gave us long ago.

Caleb made lentil burgers and chickpeas burritos while I wrote out my internship goals, read articles about mental toughness and developing relationships, and helped with laundry so he could pack for his trip. The burgers will go in the freezer and most of the burritos in our mouths. I’m grateful that Caleb gets so inspired by my passions and loves me enough to rub my feet; we’ve been hesitant with the broken toe, but it went well. I cleaned up so he could sleep and I could post.

What’s your sad scale number and why?

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Living Situation

Q&A a Day: Who do you live with? Myself on the daily, my husband mostly, and our two dogs; Sparky and Piggy.

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Caleb and I met in the middle of 2005 when we worked on the same ship in Virginia and I moved in with him before we started dating a few months later. We lived with one of his best friends and his wife and her sister and sometimes the sister’s boyfriend. Then we moved to a bigger place so we could have a bedroom of our own and the roommates continued to grow, to include a baby, another couple, and a new best friend of the wife.

We moved out and gained another roommate that was supposed to last a week and ended up being three months, to include his girlfriend and her three-year old daughter, and they lost our dog Dirty that I got from North Carolina when they moved out. In the same place we took on another roommate who stole my panties but left us with a new bed and an Xbox 360 with expensive games that I gave away.

From there we moved into our own place with our new puppy, Sparky, where I could walk to work for double shifts while Caleb was on deployment. We stayed there till he got back and then moved back into an old apartment complex for cheaper rent and half of the bathroom was in our bedroom, but we loved it.

Caleb flew to California for training while I packed us up to move to Florida. I found a place close to the base and we ran into an old friend and I babysat his girls for a while. I started going to school in January and volunteering, a lot, and that’s when I found Piggy. We moved a year later, the same distance from the campus, but on the other side. We had about six months left when we got roommates again, both a money-saving deal, but couldn’t stick to the agreement (and they think our dog murdered their stolen kitten).

This forced us into another new place and the navy forced us out of that earlier than we thought, so much that Caleb had to drop his last few classes before his degree so we could move to California. We looked at a house that looked like it was built from repurposed products, another that was very incomplete (called semi-furnished in some countries), and settled for the house on the corner with the giant backyard for dogs.

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I would live between this house and my dad’s place in Arizona for nine months while Caleb was on his third, and longest, deployment. He returned with an ultimatum: he could leave for a year and make lots of money or we could leave for two years and make less money, but it would be tax-free in Bahrain. Of course I took the adventure over the cash and we found a place along the canals of an island.

We lived in a three bedroom hotel for almost two months before finding a two-bedroom marbled floor house with gigantic kitchen to live in for the next year. When that lease expired we moved closer to downtown and his office (thinking I would drive less) but also to be closer to my friends as some of them didn’t drive or own a car. It was definitely a learning experience, one with a billiards table and swimming pool and fantastic kitchen with the tiniest stove.

Caleb flew back to the United States and wondered if I had changed my passport. It took the navy a month to get an agreement with the airlines to get me, with dogs, back to the States. My dad said it would’ve been the perfect time to leave the dogs, but they had a chip upgrade for the flight (just in case our plane crash landed in Europe, or so I was told), but I’m not ready to part with them, nor will I ever be, but the time will come.

I finally arrived stateside without a connecting flight and stayed with my dad until I could sign the papers on our old place on the corner. Caleb would drive all night to arrive home at 2am on my birthday before I drove to jump out of a plane to celebrate the occasion. We’ve had house guests and couchsurfers, but I think we’re done with roommates until one of our dads loses enough of their mind to put up with me full-time like my husband has so willingly done so for almost 13 years.

I’d been discreetly researching anniversary gifts, as our ten-year is coming up in March, but seemed only to find mostly things for me or sappy gifts for couples (which I would also love), and I told him this. I don’t want the gifts of our relationship to also be all about me because he spoils me so much the rest of the time that I want to give some of that back because I don’t give enough massages, I don’t do enough dishes, and I can just be downright crazy, hangry, upset, or weirdly moody sometimes, but he deals with it.

He’s been my favorite roommate, my best friend and travel partner, and supporter all these years. He’s the one I want to grow old and break down with, just not as quickly as we both seem to be progressing. We need less broken bones now if we want to make it to 60, so “kids” our age can hear about our recovery stories one day and be inspired to work, play, love, create, travel, and enjoy all that life has to offer.

'So, what are the neighbors like? Delicious?'

 

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Tomorrow, tomorrow

Q&A a Day: What is your resolution for tomorrow? To attend my last class of the week and finish my first week of this semester, knowing it probably won’t be my last at this school as I make a transition for a Bachelor’s Degree and continuing education.

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anatomy lesson

To go to my job/internship and build stronger relationships with the kids to get them more involved in playing, sharing, and learning while in a safe non-bullying zone (free from exclusion, yelling, and teasing).

I’ve got a future date with the Stephen W. Hawking II STEAM Charter School to look into running a program starting next school year with their older kids.

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