The Number 12

There is a church that many follow, but that few understand. I think this relates like the guitar in the band. Even those that don’t believe in a man who walked on water blindly follow other sources of happiness, forgiveness, and dedication. There is a willingness to be accepted in the main stream, but for some there is want for simple truth. The church I follow happens to be one of sweetness, temporary pleasures, and sometimes a hard break. This church is meant to be shared with others, but this isn’t a normal mass made for the gossiping lot; this is one built from the hearts of a connected few.

by Derakera

There are moments that stand out like a giraffe on a table. And as you dance to the music playing in your head, you can feel the rhythm beading in your sweat. Reach out for a partner and be prepared to give. A listening ear is only as good as the answering mouth. The barrier you build should be enough to climb. Swing the door a little harder and don’t leave me behind. When you feel the concrete begin to weigh you down, step into another realm for there is something else to be found.

Let yourself be caught in the moment of the new. Look not at the sax player, but at your own untied shoe. And when you remember that bite of yesterday think of how your words helped gravel the way. Enjoy your breakfast while it’s on your plate. Don’t think of what you could be doing, but engage yourself fully in what needs to be done. Let the emotions overtake your routine and be your food and sleep. When travelling down the road of life don’t think about the car you’re in, but the condition of your feet.

by Faith Durand

This makes sense to me. I am the number 12. I am the music you are hearing and the rhythm in your soul. I am a listener that likes to feel control. Sometimes I find my breakfast to be such a chore that I would rather eat it off my hardwood floor, but let me up unto the peachy sky and watch as not one tear runs from my eye. I too shall remember the shirt of dirt you wore, so eager to explore this sacred moment for just a second more.

I’m feeling quite emotional. I hope no one can tell, but I can taste the disappointment that’s crawling from within. Nostalgia is creeping by and stalking at the window faintly smiling at the screams gone by. It was meant to last an hour, but someone hid the clock. Search among the cushioned jet and you’re sure to find a friend. Let not someone else bear your cross, the weight was made for you. I worship the chocolate too… as well as worship me and you. If poetry was puppeteered it’d be done by nerds in big brown shoes.

You cut my heart in half and dabbled it in oil. I stabbed at the pieces with imaginary foil. I took upon my hand a lock of rusty hair that had blown my way in the sunburnt air. And even though it’s hard to breath I take a sip of something new and fill myself beyond what Sofia never knew. And if my lips should happen to pause, look not for the reason, but for the cause. Don’t lose sleep over my attitude. Keep your eyes open, but don’t be lewd.

I hope you’ll introduce me to your fan once more. The line of shit you fed me needs to fall to the floor. Cover my reflection in the purest white and maybe I’ll see differently in another light. Forget not the penguin’s key of what it is I ask. The number you are searching for is sure to be your last. Jumping in the cotton seeds is a fine farewell, but don’t forget the pair of lips that can deliver you from hell. As you lay the blinds to rest I’m sure to see you smile, but don’t forget to stand in the lavender mile.

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A Look into Long Distance Communication

view from the airplane – by Caleb

I told Caleb when he left to please think of me and my blog. Any photos from prior deployments were on my old laptop that got stolen. This would be a new opportunity to save the memories and share them with others that have no idea what deployments are about. Note: this is not a regular deployment; meaning that he is not strictly on a boat the whole time – being so restricts the amount of time that he is able to be on the computer and internet. Not just for safety reasons, but because of connection issues.

I’ve gotten lucky so far that he took my netbook with him that has a built-in camera and he was able to show me his new temporary home through a terrible internet connection. I look forward to the hour-long conversations we have when he can find time from work. Phone conversations are great too. I love being able to hear his voice from so far away, but was looking forward to him seeing me too. My dad sent me a webcam and the internet connection was so terrible that it couldn’t support video, our voices were cutting out, and we ended up messaging each other – there will be a next time.

Caleb has done well in not forgetting about my blog. He has sent some pictures of his flight over and of his new bed on board and his room on land. These pictures make me happy and I look forward to getting more. Caleb says this deployment is hard because he’s not on a 6 and 6 schedule (working six hours and then having six off) constantly. This helps keep him busy, tired, and his mind away from missing me as much. Going to a hotel room and sleeping in an ’empty’ bed feels like going home every night without a wife.

My opinion differs in that I’m excited that we can communicate so often. That has not been the case in the past, but luckily I had an ex-navy boss that was able to understand and would allow me 45 minute conversations (on the clock) while I was supposed to be working. I thank him for those moments, but I know he appreciated the work I did and that I would have quit if not given the opportunity to talk to Caleb when he found the odd chance to call. Weird that I never thought of the time difference with him on a ship, but it makes a difference now knowing that when I’m waking up he’s getting home from work.

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A San Diego Sunset for a Sailor Across the Sea

bwsun

gray pier

carving love in the sand

carving love in the sand

lots of blue

lots of blue

fruit of the sea

fruit of the sea

ripples of light

ripples of light

last splash

last splash

proof I was there

proof I was there

sticking out

sticking out

life at low tide

life at low tide

nature's art

nature’s art

uneaten cake

uneaten cake

good night

good night

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We All Start Somewhere

When I’m learning something new I see the end product and the ease with which the person showing me has accomplished the task. Nevermind their time involved with the subject or that the video was edited to show eight hours of work in 15 minutes. New skills take time to acquire. My dad helps remind me of this when bringing up a parents joys at a kids first step or word and how much crawling and coaxing it took. Or the excitement on my face as a toddler when I saw a pail of sand turned into a sandcastle; how long would it take me to get the sand amount and pail angle right to make my own.

How long would it take me to make my own decisions or pick my own favorite color – the answer: years. And for some of these skills that I have taken a lifetime to learn (like talking) I still have trouble with on occasion. My dad took this into consideration and made me a curriculum since my idea of a calendar goal sheet wasn’t producing the results I thought it would because the goals were too broad. With his help I am able to see how the different applications I am learning in can be used together to create a variety of media to be exported in many formats. My typical day consists of eight lessons and I am to dedicate one hour to each.

curriculum – a typical day

I start with some math from Khan Academy – on online classroom for math, science and other classes that Sal teaches on his e-blackboard. Classes are taught in short segments and multiple colors for ease of understanding and to keep the student from getting bored. I’m learning about matrices and shown below is how to use them to solve a system of equations. After watching the lesson I go to the practice page to test my understanding. I’m able to set goals and keep track of time spent on how well I’m developing in each skill.

My next lesson is in Python – a programming language that I will learn how to use in Blender and Maya (programs for future lessons and posts). It’s a free program that has relatively easy to learn syntax (computer grammar). I’m reading the Non-Programmer’s Tutorial for Python 3 on Wikibooks. So far, it is easy to write sentences and small math problems, but I’m having difficulty with the correct output when it comes to multiple lines for one input.

After that creative genius I move onto reading about what others are doing in the field of generative arts – art made using algorithms (fancy math term). And that’s one of the reasons I’m learning math online. With experience in combining coding practices with digital fabrication people can create distorted 3D scanned objects, parametric paper-folding, and multi-screen video. The art doesn’t stop there; even Mozart jumped on the generative bandwagon in 1757 with his musical piece: “Musikalisches Würfelspiel”.

Finding inspiration in that I’m able to learn Processing – another programming language, but a bit more fun. I am able to tell it shapes and colors and it returns aliens and blocks that move – think the cars in the game Frogger. Its website defines it as: an electronic sketchbook for developing ideas. It is easy to navigate and go back in code to fix mistakes. The website has some easy-to-follow tutorials in a step-by-step method. Today’s lesson is two-dimensional arrays that can be arranged in a matrix (back to math).

input on left equals output on right

After a lunch break it’s time to do something a little more familiar. I started learning about After Effects (Ae) a little over a year ago and will watch some refresher video tutorials. Ae works with animation – movement that happens over time. I am able to work with photos and videos that I can import from Premiere (Pr), Photoshop, and Bridge and export to Pr, Flash, etc. Pr is great for sequencing videos and Ae gives me more control (size, shape, color, speed) over my footage. The screen shot is a composition of falling text.

After building confidence in Ae, I work in Prelude – a video indexing program that is built more for sharing. I am able to add comments and other markers directly to the video files as photo stills or audio-only files aren’t supported. It has the option to add unassociated metadata which is a great way for a director to share information with the editors (while one is on site and the other in the office.) Below is a clip of a sunset time-lapse in logging mode that I used while watching a workshop course on video2brain.

Into my seventh hour and I delve into Illustrator – the more business oriented program with the ability to make brochures, menus, and business cards. I can make letter heads, book sleeves, and update my résumé too. There is a large workspace with room to edit multiple artboards (ie menu pages) at once. The layer panel makes it easy to edit and organize. There is a zoom feature for picking out details on a face and a spray can that allows me to spray an item chosen from my artboard (perhaps a camera spray to outline my article on blogging). And plenty more tools to keep my curiosity.

No training day is complete without a program to make a beat – Ableton. A music making program with limitless instrument editing options and enough effects to entertain live or record at home. There is a helpful box at the bottom that gives a little description of what I hover the mouse over – a timesaver. There are knobs to turn, buttons to push, and sliders to move. The founders encourage me to try them all to make a sound that is my own, and to, “Stay creative,” so I sidechained a bass drum to get audio from a kick drum – sound coming soon. Stay tuned.

Question of the Day: How do you stay creative?

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A Weekend’s Notice

a souq – photo by Ian and Wendy Sewell

I constantly email Caleb about my day – surprisingly about everything except what I’m wearing. He emails me when work and internet connection will allow. One such email was telling me the whereabouts of him and his roommates. One of them had gone to the souke which Google defines as: to suck. In another email Caleb fixed his misspelling and a souq is an open-air marketplace found commonly in Arab countries.

The other night I was in the kitchen shelling pistachios and thought I heard the phone ring. After the second time I grabbed the phone and turned on the radio to hear, “Imagine me and you, I do; I think about you day and night…” And that’s exactly what I was doing. These nuts would go in my oatmeal to give me a filling breakfast to give me the energy needed to pack up our house and move; move our stuff into storage and me into the car – I was planning on making myself homeless.

I spent the weekend packing in hopes that not seeing all our stuff, and smelling it, would make me miss Caleb less. I had shopped around for a storage unit, found a U-haul nearby, and was in the middle of writing my leasing company when my dad called to talk some sense into me. It took two hours, but the effect will last the deployment. Now instead of wandering the streets, smelly and full of new foods, I can plan a camping trip and take a mini-vacation in the middle of the week.

Well, now that I was going to stay home I had some time to read. I began the story of Sense and Sensibility, two sisters in the country looking for love or money or both. I prefer to read about science, history, technology, etc., but if I do branch from my normal reading I choose the classics for the educated writing that has caught the attention of generations and improved their vocabulary and speech. I suppose books can be like music – just because you don’t like a certain style (twitter books) doesn’t unmake them what they are, but it will show in my writing (which I’m trying to improve, not break down).

image by Carroll Zahn

I’ve also been reading a blog, JohnWise.com, and immersing myself as deep into Alaska as my computer monitor will allow. My dad has been busy narrowing down his selection of the amazing (photos) to share with his readers. I enjoy reading about larger-than-life mountains; and staring at the bright, little wildflowers that soak up the sun for 22 hours a day while the sun can be found before the snow and darkness blanket its home once again for the eight month winter season.

a peek into Alaska

As the weekend came to a close, I took a bath in oatmeal and raspberry – more like a breakfast than a cleaning method, but it was relaxing; that is, until I looked at the soap scum on the tile walls and glass doors. Then I began to think about how dirty the house might be. I sweep up the dog hairs and sand, but the cobwebs (popular to southern California) remain hidden. So even though I will be staying put in this new-to-us-temporary house I will be doing some major cleaning.

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